Hypnosis FACT!!

 Photo: BrainInBlue

     Do you trust hypnosis? Hypnosis happens inside your subconcius mind. If you know what hypnosis is, how can you tell the situation? As a human, the real person who drill down this will know how does it happens, how it happens & the feeling while it happens.

     In this world now, hypnosis is a weapon for marketing. There is a way to generate human attraction to buy something, do something & much more with hypnosis. Read the rest and find more how is the situation during hypnosis happens.

Mental Block and Hypnosis

     Mental Block in Hypnosis language arts or better known as Ego State in which they are available to everyone.

     Do you a seller or individual who tried to positive anchoring for your daily life? Hope this information was very helpful to expand brain ability.

     Ego state played a role as a filter in the brain, so all the information received daily either get past the ego state or thrown back without passing through a sieve or the wall.

     When a person arrives Ego State collapse is when they accept, condone, allow, authorize, surrender, release, or similar words to it on a matter or situation.

     For example, a new movie playing at the theater, whether you allow yourself to watch it or block your mind from watching it with a thousand reasons.

     Ego State can be enlarged and reduced according to your own requirements.

     Go to dozens of classes or seminars with a very popular trainer ... if you are a big Ego State, the science presented consequently it will not work properly rolled in the brain ...

     In short ... our life is in the Hypnotic State where it call Hypnosis condition from you get up from sleeping till of you get up from bed til you sleep again on your comfort bed.

     You saw an ad in fb picture ABC (Air Batu Campur) who worked with beautiful pictures and appetizing. Then you saw the trusted comments will make you learn more about the ABC. From that, until you reach a level of your own friend told ABC or carry it into your office for two and felt a spoonful of friends in office.

     Finally you buy it ... when you 'buy' is where INDUCTION has erupted ... (Induction of the language art of hypnosis), which means it has reached the target / destination

Then it was called hypnosis

     The great Marketing Planner out there who work for large Company such as Air Asia, Acer, Samsung, Coca Cola, Hollywood movies, etc ... they use hypnosis techniques and review how can 'anchoring' them with a product / group to the right people with the right price and at the right time for promotion .... consequently ... BOOMMMM ...

Success Energy erupted ...

• How do they create those opportunities?
• How do I collapse Ego State?
• And how to construct the 'rappot' (language arts NLP) between Developer and Client?
• Or how to 'Anchor' (language arts hypnosis) between the product and the situation or group of people at the right time?

The answer is in you ... find the key ... God willing 😊

Life is like a wheel?

Fleeting glance above and below?

     Do not set our thought so ... Setting the wrong thinking consequently be wrong ... very wrong and wrong ...

More wrong and more uncertain

Do not let your life be a wheel ...

YES ...

Rights ... It remains spinning ... but not in wheel spin ... you will not be going anywhere

but,

Let your life spins like a spiral ... getting in the latent ... the faster the more cohesive ...

So you have to keep your mind set ...
What do you think is going to be who you are ...

If it's more solid ... and consequently ...

"Today is better than yesterday!
Today is better than yesterday!
Tomorrow is better than today!
and...
The day after tomorrow is better than tomorrow!"

Hopefully ...

You can change your way of thinking towards the success ...

     If you are on the way to KL ... or go to JB ... You would seem a big billboard that says this

"Wipe First Then Play"

What are you thinking? What is the first lap you can imagined?

Well ...

The left brain you are interpreting something familiar about the interpretation of yourself ...

When you focused on the Billboard ... apparently ... it is true ... SPORTS cream products to avoid sprain / strain during sports / football / badminton etc.

"WIPE FIRST THEN PLAY"

It is a system that solves 'Ego State' in your brain turn directly into your subconscious ...

When your subconscious mind is on your right brain play an important role to the advert ... certainly if you want to play sports ... what products are you looking for?

Well of course ...

Products in these billboards ...

That's called Hypnoselling ...

Hypnosis + Selling = Hypnoselling

Selling by entering the Pre-Induction into the memory of the brain ...

This is the first basic step In engineering methods Marketing & Selling ...


Would you like to know next? Try this first before you go to the next chapter...

How Social Media Is Making You Feel Bad about Yourself Every Day

 Photo: Intelysis

     Do you ever feel worse about yourself after scrolling through Facebook or Twitter? Does it seem as though everyone is leading a life better than your own? It’s all too easy to get jealous of others on social media. Vacation photos, engagement announcements, wedding shoots – it can be enough to make you seriously envious.

Symptoms of social media envy

     So what are the symptoms of social media envy? The main clue is an overall drop in mood. You might feel empty after reading some particularly upbeat posts from a friend or relative. You may also feel compelled to read through all their posts, or flick through all their photo albums. Even when you feel jealous, it’s as though you can’t look away. On some level, you might even enjoy using their posts as a stick with which to beat yourself. Within minutes, you can spiral downwards into a pit of self-loathing and despair. You might also feel bad for feeling jealous. After all, shouldn’t you feel happy for others?

Humans are inherently competitive

     It may help to understand how this phenomenon arises in the first place. Humans are inherently social creatures who like connecting with others, but we are also a competitive species. The truth is that most of us enjoy showing off to some extent. The inevitable outcome is a society of people who tend to take every opportunity to show the world just how great they are, and how well their lives are going. Unfortunately, it is hard to remember this when you are browsing Facebook, and this is where the problems start. According to a study carried out at the University of Copenhagen, we start to feel envious when we compare our everyday lives with other people’s highlight reel – which is all social media really is.¹ When you fall into the trap of compar ing your private self with other people’s public personas, you are bound to feel inferior!

Jealousy is like real pain

     Why is a jealousy a problem? It might feel like a mere annoyance on a day-to-day level, but the effects can accumulate over time. According to a piece research published in the journal Science, envy and physical pain make use of the same regions in the brain.² It actually hurts to feel jealous, and it can become a bad habit. Over time, you can become a bitter person who is too busy overanalyzing their own shortcomings rather than living life.

So what can you do to combat social media envy? 

Remove boastful people from your friends list

     If you follow people who make a point of showing off at every available opportunity, unfollow or delete them. Boastful people are rarely good friends anyway. If you still want to keep in touch with them, stick to text or instant messenger instead.

Don’t be afraid to mention good things in your own life

     If you have some good news to share, spread the positivity! There is nothing wrong in acknowledging your achievements and highlights on your profile. It’s only when it is done to excess or to make others jealous that you need to re-evaluate your behavior. Other people might have good lives, but chances are that you have great moments too. You could also set up a private profile that only you can view. Make this private profile as positive or even as boastful as you like. It sounds silly, but it could be a good self-esteem boost.

Limit social media time

     The simplest way to avoid succumbing to envy is to limit the amount of time you spend reading other people’s posts. Never allow yourself to waste hours looking longingly through a feed or photo album. Set yourself a reasonable time limit per day, and stick to it.

Use social media to connect, not compare

     Social networks are designed for positive interactions, not pointless and unhealthy comparisons. Keep your focus where it belongs. Take a genuine interest in other people’s activities, lives, and opinions rather than running yourself down by making it into a competition.

     You don’t have to give up Instagram, Facebook, or other social media platforms entirely. They are great tools for staying in touch with others. However, in order to combat jealousy, you need to keep a balanced perspective and be willing to take a step back when necessary.

Source: LifeHack

Articles Psychology & Counseling

 Photo: CariDotCom

     Healthy Mental InfoChanges in the social landscape today has greatly contributed to the overall increase in health problems and psychological disorders such as the issue of marriage, family, work stress, alcoholism, drug abuse and so on. This condition can lead to depression, anxiety, stress and various psychological disorders that impact the quality of life and well-being holistically.  

     Mental health is often associated with mental illness but this statement is inaccurate. Mental health is closely related to our lives. It includes feelings, thoughts and behaviors in yourself, the ability to interact well with others, society and environment and how one handles the responsibilities, challenges and pressures that arise in everyday life.  

     Mentally healthy individuals able to maintain harmonious relations with others, participate in community activities and can contribute in the community (Definition of the World Health Organization - WHO). Burden of Disease study by the World Health Organization (WHO) predicts that depression among the causes of mental illness will rise to second in the top after ischemic heart disease worldwide by 2020. 

     In Malaysia, the National Health and Morbidity Survey-III in 2006 to demonstrate the existence of mental health problems is 11.2 percent among adults and 20.3 percent among children and teenagers. The study also reported that as many as 3 million of the 26 million Malaysians suffer from mental health problems.From these statistics, a total of 20 to 30 people out of every 100,000 people commit suicide each year available.

     Improvements were also seen in the trend of mental problems get treatment at government hospitals by 15.6 percent, or 400, 227 in 2008 to 346, 196 patients in 2007. This illustrates that the mental health of people affected today and deteriorating. 

What Is Mental Illness?

     Mental illness is a disease that involves the disruption of brain function that can cause changes to the process of thinking, feeling and behavior which cause disruption to undergo daily activities. Report of the World Health Organization (WHO) show that mental illness is among the 5 major diseases that cause disability worldwide and is expected in 2020 will be the cause of the disease is the second highest. 

Mental Health vs. Physical Health

     Mental well-being can affect physical health. Mental illness can seriously impacted. Individuals who suffer or suffered from mental problems usually less concerned than they physical perspective. According to the study, the effects of mental illness in life is greater than other risks, such as smoking, obesity and diabetes. 

Mental disorders 

     Characteristics of individuals suffering from mental disorder;Contrary Habits:
Individual tells see and hear things that do not exist, namely hallucinations and delusions.

Behavior contrary to the public: 

     Every society / culture has a common procedure and manners that followed.

Perceptions and interpretations of reality: 

     People who are dealing with stress and grief. In addition, they tend to deny and can not accept reality.

One of Adaption: 

     Behaviors that restrict the functionality, roles and behaviors that cause distress and fear, and fear of being in places where many people like supermarkets and large gatherings.

Personal predicament: 

     Suffering from emotional problems such as anxiety, fear and depression. Emotions prolonged to interfere individuals to function normally.

Dangerous behavior: 

     Individuals who want to kill yourself and do threaten the lives of others as a result of emotional stress.Types of Mental Illness: 

Generally it can be divided into three categories:

Neurosis

     Individuals who belong to this group of people experienced the change and disruption to the thoughts, feelings and behavior but it is not up to the level that may affect health. Individuals suffering from neuroses often aware of the state of health but daily activities disrupted.  

Examples of neuroses are: Depression
 
    Depression is a feeling of extreme sadness and prolonged. Sad is the feeling that we often experience feelings of sadness, but if it is too much to bear, last more than two weeks and interfere with daily functions then it is not that common but sad depressive illness.      

Fear

    The disease digejalai by feelings of fear, worry and anxiety. A person will feel tense, sweating, pounding beat and feel extreme fear will harm they do not know the cause.

Psychosis 

     Those who suffer from psychosis experienced very significant change in the thoughts, feelings and behaviors. Their health is also affected. Patients will feel confused by experienced voices to communicate with those who are called hallucinations. They also have strange beliefs that are not shared by others and cause extreme reactions from patients who are called delusions. Among the examples assume Delusions is no one wants to persecute them or to do evil to cause them to act against the suspects to be dangerous. They may speak gibberish or nonsense, such as speaking a strange behavior, laugh or get angry with no reason. Examples of psychosis often experience are:

Schizophrenia
 
    Schizophrenia is among the main features of the individual will suffer from hallucinations, delusions, disorganized thinking, disorganized speech and behavior. In addition, their performance also deteriorated significantly.

Bipolar disorder

    The disease causes them to experience significant changes in terms of mood and emotion. They often lose control and become too excited (manic) or very sad (depressive phase). 

Personality Disorders

     Basically this disorder that makes a person's character or character defects. Problems experienced this can affect interpersonal relationships with those around him.

i. Cause Occurrence of Mental Illness 

There are several factors that are likely to be the onset of a mental illness.

ii. Factors Genetics / Heredity

    Family members with a history of mental illness are at higher risk than the population that has no history of the disease.

iii. Chemicals In Brain Disorders

    When chemicals in the brain called neurotransmitters do not work with a mental illness will appear. For example:

• Schizophrenia: High concentration of dopamine.
• Depression: serotonin levels are too low.
• Mania: extreme increase in serotonin levels.
• Concern: There are some problems in the production and function of noradrenaline.

iv. Virus infection

     According to research a disease caused by a viral infection has been associated with the emergence of mental illness.

 v. The Bitter Life History
 
     Some examples are experiencing a difficult birth process, have lost their parents as a kid, too many are experiencing difficult life challenges.

vi. Socio-Economic Situation Low
 
    Poverty, do not have basic or violence in the community can improve the problem of mental illness.

Does Mental Illness Can be cured? 

     Yes, mental illness can be cured. This is because the advances in modern medicine have enabled the discovery of drugs that are more effective in treating mental illness. Almost all drugs used to treat mental illness take some time before its positive effects can be seen. Patience continue taking medication consistently highly recommended. In addition to the support approach psychotropic drugs such as counseling, psychotherapy, cognitive therapy, group therapy, family therapy, educational psychology, therapy, work rehabilitation and psycho-social recovery has proved equally important. 

Are Tests That Can Measure Your Fitness Level 

     Yes. Individuals who wish to know the status of their mental health problems can take a mental health screening program through online because it is easy, fast and simple. However, it can not replace an assessment which are carried out by trained mental health personnel. 
How Would You Like Mental Healthy?


Managing Yourself

• Recognizing the weaknesses and strengths of yourself.
• Attempting to control his feelings.
• Willing to accept failure.
• Being able to avoid immoral activities.
• Appreciate yourself.
  

Healthy Social Intercourse

• Ability to communicate effectively with others.
• Being able to give and receive affection.
• Know the respect and trust of others.
• To accept other people's opinions openly

Ready for the Challenge

• Able to face and solve problems.
• Able to cope with conflict wisely.
• Being able to make decisions for yourself.
• Ready to get help if they fail to solve everyday problems.

Steps Towards a Positive Mental Health

• Accepting yourself realistically.
• Handle with good time (time management).
• Plan changes in life wisely.
• Fostering harmony and love with family members and others.
• Maintain physical health.
• Provide time for physical activity and recreation.
• To ensure sufficient rest and sleep.
• Controlling mental stress effectively.
• Applying the principles of good spirituality.
• Share your problems with others and get professional help if necessary.

Source : Jabatan Pertahanan Awam Malaysia(JPAM)

Ride with Robi the robot

Sit on it, Robi: Robi sitting on his charging base. It’s too bad that the design of the base is such that Robi cannot set himself down to charge. — TAN KIT HOONG/The Star

This robot walks, talks and listens to you

Judging from the number of people that gathered around our desk when we started Robi the robot up, everyone seems to have a fascination with automatons, especially those that can speak or sing.

In fact, Robi does more than that – it recognises commands and can ­perform a number of tricks, like doing push-ups and answering questions in a variety of languages.

However, while a robot that does all this is nothing new, the Robi is a little unusual in that you actually build it from parts that come bundled with a weekly magazine.

Yes, that’s right – Robi is an interactive robot that you can build yourself.

Kit robot

As far as we can remember, Robi is the most advanced product that we’ve seen sold as a part-by-part kit in ­magazines.

The kit comes in parts spread over 70 magazine issues, with detailed assembly instructions.

Robi can speak, sing, dance and do pushups when asked to do so.

The first issue is RM24.90 but depending on the part you get in each issue, some issues (such as the one with the CPU or the speech recognition circuit board) can cost you RM137.

However, those prices are not the norm and most issues of the magazine will cost you RM74.90 each.

Subscription prices will be lower, however – there’s a 10% discount off each issue when you subscribe.

The magazine is released weekly, which means that it’s going to take well over a year to complete building the robot – that’s quite a long time to wait to get the complete robot.

We got our prototype Robi already pre-assembled so we didn’t have the opportunity to experience the fun of putting the robot together.

However, we did get to test the product quite a bit in the week or so that we had Robi to try out.

Fun and games

Aesthetically, Robi is a pretty cute robot – some people we showed it to have observed that it looks vaguely like Osamu Tezuka’s Astro Boy.

The robot does feel hefty and pretty high-quality in the hand.

Our only concern is the docking base for the Robot – we’re not sure if it’s our prototype sample, but it does take a bit of force to dock Robi into its base to charge.

The base looks like a tiny stool which Robi sits on, but strangely enough because of the design of the power connector, the robot can’t go back and sit down to charge itself.

Robi’s scarf houses the power switch and also doubles as a handle for carrying the robot around.

The power switch is located on Robi’s scarf, which also serves as a carrying handle – the instructions recommend that you carry the robot either using this carrying handle or hold it around the waist to ensure that you don’t damage the ­servomotors.

Once you turn it on, the eyes will flash to tell you that Robi is ready to go.

Robi has microphones and voice recognition technology and it responds to certain phrases like “What’s your name?”, “Robi come here” and “Introduce yourself.”

However, the ones that will get Robi to perform the most interesting actions are “Do push-ups” and “Come on, let’s dance”, which of course gets Robi to perform those actions.

This isn’t Apple’s Siri or Google Assistant however – not only are you limited to specific phrases, you also have to speak slowly, fairly loudly and clearly to get Robi to respond.

We tried it a few times and at first Robi wouldn’t respond until we increased the volume of our voice and spoke clearly.

Robi is supposed to respond to over 250 phrases, but the prototype model we got responded to only about 20 or 30 phrases.

Interestingly, these phrases include some questions in Mandarin as well – when asked questions in Mandarin, Robi will respond in Mandarin as well.

The localisation also includes some Malaysian English phrases, so Robi can respond to “What’s your name?” with “Just call me Robi lah!”

Battery life is not particularly long – if you ask Robi to do push-ups or dance a lot, you’re looking at perhaps about 15 to 20 minutes of battery life at most before Robi will tell you that he needs to be charged again.

Oh yes, one thing that Robi can also do is that it can be used as an infrared remote control for your TV, although we couldn’t test this function since we had no way of setting the built-up robot to learn the infrared signals from our brand of TV.

From what we’ve gathered, though, you set the robot to “learn” the ­infrared signal of your particular TV brand during the assembly process – Robi simply captures the TV remote’s ON/OFF signal when the robot’s ­infrared circuit board is put into ­learning mode.

Conclusion

Whether you think Robi is a great product or not depends on your expectations – if you think you’re getting a personal assistant or pet that will follow you around and carry stuff for you then you’re going to be disappointed.

However, as a project to put together with your kids which will ultimately get you a walking, talking, dancing robot, then Robi is really fun – I know that if I were a kid, I’d have been ecstatic to build such a thing.

However, do be aware that although spread across 70 issues, you’re ­ultimately paying about RM5,300 if you buy it at the local newsstand, or almost RM5,000 if you subscribe.

Pros: Surprisingly sophisticated for a kit robot.
Cons: Battery life is relatively short; Robi only responds well if you speak clearly and slowly.

Robi(DeAgostini)Robot

Specifications: Speech recognition, microcontroller, infrared emitter, motion sensors, servomotors
Dimensions (W X D X H): 9.5 x 17 x 34cm
Weight: about 1kg
Website: www.myrobi.my
Price: Approximately RM5,000
Rating: Four stars

Review unit courtesy of DeAgostini Malaysia, (03) 2168-3738

Source: The Star

Tips For Beauty and Healthy Hair

     A beautiful and healthy hair is the dream of us. However, not everyone has healthy hair because hair loss and scalp dandruff. If any of you figuring out the solution to the problem, try this old method, which will work for you.

Tip to prevent dandruff and have a healthy hair in traditional way

 

Pandan Leaves

 Pandan Extract

     Take a few pandan leaves and blend. Once blended, filter range of the water. After shampooing and cleaning, spread evenly across your head. Let it sit for 10 minutes. Then rinse with water and dry.

     These tips should be practiced regularly to increase hair and get rid of dandruff on the head. Besides, hair will also be scented with the fragrance of pandan leaves.

     Beauty tips for healthy and beautiful hair, free from dandruffs. You need to apply this beauty tip regularly to achieve the desired result.

How to: Recycle a Rubber Hose into a Cheap & Comfy Chair

     Clean modern lines, wood and metal supports … one could almost imagine this being sold at your local contemporary furniture store for thousands of dollars. Except: that comfortable-looking lining threaded between the structural frame is an ordinary, everyday reused garden hose. Total cost? About twenty bucks.

     A few pieces of plywood, threaded metal rods, washers and bolts are all that is needed to construct the supporting elements on the sides of the seat. The standard-sized rubber hose is then woven between holes punched in the ply.

     By stretching the length of hose tightly across the frame, weight becomes evenly distributed along all lines of rubber that stretch to create the comfortable and flexible surface of the finished furniture object. Pivot joints at the front and back of the main seating element allow for various heights and angles and thus maximum comfort.

Source: Dornob.com

Don't Eat Carrot!?

     Let's practice of eating carrots in our daily diet. There are 10 things you need to know about the goodness of carrots:

Skin

Carrots are very good for the skin because it has Vitamin A and antioxidants that will protect the skin from sun damage. Carrots prevent acne, dry skin, premature wrinkles and help you to get a fairer

Eyes

Carrots are a rich source of Vitamin A and B, which help you to produce better vision.

Cancer

Carrots increase immunity power and also help to combat cancer.


Cholesterol

Eat a carrot every day helps to remove bad cholesterol from the body.

Brain

Carrots have more calories that help to improve memory power of a child.

Release tension

To relieve the stress, drink a glass of carrot juice every day.

Healthy Heart

Carrots fortified with beta-carotene, alpha-carotene and lutein, which helps reduce the risk of heart disease.

Cleaning Agent

Rich with fiber that helps to clean the colon and reduce fat in the liver.

Antiseptic

Source said the herb horseradish can be used to prevent infection. They can be used on cooked or chopped raw wound.

Anti-Aging

Beta-carotene is found in carrots help delay the aging of cells in the body.

GOOD FOR HEAVY SMOKERS

     For heavy smokers, oil content attrition, rafanol and rafarin of carrots can neutralize the toxic smoke. To overcome the feeling of tightness or lung disease caused by too much smoking, can use carrot water extraction. Drink carrots juice once a month.

     Or for teenagers who are so lazy to make carrot juice, carrot can be made salads while enjoying lunch or dinner.

FOR SLIMMING BODY

Carrots can also be used for slimming. It can help reduce the appetite because it contains enzymes that aid digestion and prevent the accumulation of fat in the body.

Carrots are a good choice for those of you who want to lose body weight. Besides rich in potassium, carrots also contain vitamin B6 and vitamin C. Fiber is found in vegetables that will keep you full longer.

Choosing To Be Happy

Strategies for Happiness: 7 Steps to Becoming a Happier Person

A popular greeting card attributes this quote to Henry David Thoreau: "Happiness is like a butterfly: the more you chase it, the more it will elude you, but if you turn your attention to other things, it will come and sit softly on your shoulder."

With all due respect to the author of Walden, that just isn't so, according to a growing number of psychologists. You can choose to be happy, they say. You can chase down that elusive butterfly and get it to sit on your shoulder. How? In part, by simply making the effort to monitor the workings of your mind.

Research has shown that your talent for happiness is, to a large degree, determined by your genes. Psychology professor David T. Lykken, author of Happiness: Its Nature and Nurture, says that "trying to be happier is like trying to be taller." We each have a "happiness set point," he argues, and move away from it only slightly.

And yet, psychologists who study happiness -- including Lykken -- believe we can pursue happiness. We can do this by thwarting negative emotions such as pessimism, resentment, and anger. And we can foster positive emotions, such as empathy, serenity, and especially gratitude.

Happiness Strategy # 1: Don't Worry, Choose Happy 

 

The first step, however, is to make a conscious choice to boost your happiness. In his book, The Conquest of Happiness, published in 1930, the philosopher Bertrand Russell had this to say: "Happiness is not, except in very rare cases, something that drops into the mouth, like a ripe fruit. ... Happiness must be, for most men and women, an achievement rather than a gift of the gods, and in this achievement, effort, both inward and outward, must play a great part."

Today, psychologists who study happiness heartily agree. The intention to be happy is the first of The 9 Choices of Happy People listed by authors Rick Foster and Greg Hicks in their book of the same name.

"Intention is the active desire and commitment to be happy," they write. "It's the decision to consciously choose attitudes and behaviors that lead to happiness over unhappiness."

Tom G. Stevens, PhD, titled his book with the bold assertion, You Can Choose to Be Happy. "Choose to make happiness a top goal," Stevens tells WebMD. "Choose to take advantage of opportunities to learn how to be happy. For example, reprogram your beliefs and values. Learn good self-management skills, good interpersonal skills, and good career-related skills. Choose to be in environments and around people that increase your probability of happiness. The persons who become the happiest and grow the most are those who also make truth and their own personal growth primary values."

In short, we may be born with a happiness "set point," as Lykken calls it, but we are not stuck there. Happiness also depends on how we manage our emotions and our relationships with others.

Jon Haidt, author of The Happiness Hypothesis, teaches positive psychology. He actually assigns his students to make themselves happier during the semester.

"They have to say exactly what technique they will use," says Haidt, a professor at the University of Virginia, in Charlottesville. "They may choose to be more forgiving or more grateful. They may learn to identify negative thoughts so they can challenge them. For example, when someone crosses you, in your mind you build a case against that person, but that's very damaging to relationships. So they may learn to shut up their inner lawyer and stop building these cases against people."

Once you've decided to be happier, you can choose strategies for achieving happiness. Psychologists who study happiness tend to agree on ones like these.

 

Happiness Strategy #2: Cultivate Gratitude

In his book, Authentic Happiness, University of Pennsylvania psychologist Martin Seligman encourages readers to perform a daily "gratitude exercise." It involves listing a few things that make them grateful. This shifts people away from bitterness and despair, he says, and promotes happiness.

 

Happiness Strategy #3: Foster Forgiveness 

 

Holding a grudge and nursing grievances can affect physical as well as mental health, according to a rapidly growing body of research. One way to curtail these kinds of feelings is to foster forgiveness. This reduces the power of bad events to create bitterness and resentment, say Michael McCullough and Robert Emmons, happiness researchers who edited The Psychology of Happiness.

In his book, Five Steps to Forgiveness, clinical psychologist Everett Worthington Jr. offers a 5-step process he calls REACH. First, recall the hurt. Then empathize and try to understand the act from the perpetrator's point of view. Be altruistic by recalling a time in your life when you were forgiven. Commit to putting your forgiveness into words. You can do this either in a letter to the person you're forgiving or in your journal. Finally, try to hold on to the forgiveness. Don't dwell on your anger, hurt, and desire for vengeance.

The alternative to forgiveness is mulling over a transgression. This is a form of chronic stress, says Worthington.

"Rumination is the mental health bad boy," Worthington tells WebMD. "It's associated with almost everything bad in the mental health field -- obsessive-compulsive disorder, depression, anxiety -- probably hives, too."

 

Happiness Strategy #4: Counteract Negative Thoughts and Feelings

As Jon Haidt puts it, improve your mental hygiene. In The Happiness Hypothesis, Haidt compares the mind to a man riding an elephant. The elephant represents the powerful thoughts and feelings -- mostly unconscious -- that drive your behavior. The man, although much weaker, can exert control over the elephant, just as you can exert control over negative thoughts and feelings.

"The key is a commitment to doing the things necessary to retrain the elephant," Haidt says. "And the evidence suggests there's a lot you can do. It just takes work."

For example, you can practice meditation, rhythmic breathing, yoga, or relaxation techniques to quell anxiety and promote serenity. You can learn to recognize and challenge thoughts you have about being inadequate and helpless.

"If you learn techniques for identifying negative thoughts, then it's easier to challenge them," Haidt said. "Sometimes just reading David Burns' book, Feeling Good, can have a positive effect."

 

Happiness Strategy #5: Remember, Money Can't Buy Happiness 

 

Research shows that once income climbs above the poverty level, more money brings very little extra happiness. Yet, "we keep assuming that because things aren't bringing us happiness, they're the wrong things, rather than recognizing that the pursuit itself is futile," writes Daniel Gilbert in his book, Stumbling on Happiness. "Regardless of what we achieve in the pursuit of stuff, it's never going to bring about an enduring state of happiness."

 

Happiness Strategy #6: Foster Friendship 

 

There are few better antidotes to unhappiness than close friendships with people who care about you, says David G. Myers, author of The Pursuit of Happiness. One Australian study found that people over 70 who had the strongest network of friends lived much longer.

"Sadly, our increasingly individualistic society suffers from impoverished social connections, which some psychologists believe is a cause of today's epidemic levels of depression," Myers writes. "The social ties that bind also provide support in difficult times."

 

Happiness Strategy #7: Engage in Meaningful Activities 

 

People are seldom happier, says psychologist Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi, than when they're in the "flow." This is a state in which your mind becomes thoroughly absorbed in a meaningful task that challenges your abilities. Yet, he has found that the most common leisure time activity -- watching TV -- produces some of the lowest levels of happiness.

To get more out of life, we need to put more into it, says Csikszentmihalyi. "Active leisure that helps a person grow does not come easily," he writes in Finding Flow. "Each of the flow-producing activities requires an initial investment of attention before it begins to be enjoyable."

So it turns out that happiness can be a matter of choice -- not just luck. Some people are lucky enough to possess genes that foster happiness. However, certain thought patterns and interpersonal skills definitely help people become an "epicure of experience," says David Lykken, whose name, in Norwegian, means "the happiness."


Source: WebMD